Now playing: Cherry wine.

Her eyes and words are so icy
Oh but she burns
Like rum on the fire
Hot and fast and angry
As she can be
I walk my days on a wire

It looks ugly, but it’s clean
Oh mamma, don’t fuss over me

The way she tells me I’m hers and she is mine
Open hand or closed fist would be fine
The blood is red and sweet as cherry wine

Calls of guilty thrown at me
All while she stains
The sheets of some other
Thrown at me so powerfully
Just like she throws with the arm of her brother

But I want it, it’s a crime
That she’s not around most of the time

Way she shows me I’m hers and she is mine
Open hand or closed fist would be fine
The blood is red and sweet as cherry wine

Her fight and fury is fiery
Oh but she loves
Like sleep to the freezing
Sweet and right and merciful
I’m all but washed
In the tide of her breathing

And it’s worth it, it’s divine
I have this some of the time

Way she shows me I’m hers and she is mine
Open hand or closed fist would be fine
The blood is rare and sweet as cherry wine.

Secret hopes.

I’m someone who’s mostly dead inside but still has a little hope for something extraordinary, which, as I said, is the worst breed of human, because it means I know everything is bullshit, but that I secretly hope for the day when it might not be.

― Nick Miller

Now playing: Houdini.

Rise above, gonna start the war!
What you want, what you need, what’d you come here for?
Well, an eye for an eye and an ‘F’ for fight
They’re taking me down as the prisoners riot

Got shackles on, my words are tied
Fear can make you compromise
Lights turned up, it’s hard to hide
Sometimes I wanna disappear

When I feel kinda bad and don’t want to stress
I just pass it off on ability
Well, you got what you want, and what you never knew
Perfect gift from me to you

Got shackles on, my words are tied
Fear can make you compromise
With the lights turned up, it’s hard to hide
Sometimes I wanna disappear

(Raise up to your ability)
You never knew what I could find
What would come when we realize
I don’t want to compromise

(Raise up to your ability)
Yeah I’m scared but I disappear
Running around before it corners you
I can’t go because my life’s a wreck

(Raise up to your ability)
I know that you want me
‘Cause it’s simple to see of my ability

(Raise up to your ability)
Yeah you’re undecided
Yeah so I can see that
Yeah I don’t wanna runaway

You gotta focus on your ability
Focus on your ability
Gotta focus on your ability
Focus on your ability

Can’t get what they want to steal
Can’t get what they want to steal
Then they can’t get what they want to steal
Can’t get what they want to steal.

Many the miles.

I loved him like a cretin
once,
when galaxies
ruled the night.
A lifetime’s worth
in one
heartbeat.
Unforeseen
was the moment
he tore down
the walls,
took the trite
and turned them
into effervescent pearls
of light.
An anarchy of
swallowtails
and hues of red
erupted in my gut,
my chest,
his love
made sticky
in my blood.
But,

…yesterday,
love crumbled
to its knees.
It stood there,
nose bloody
from defeat
returning a heart
on loan,
not sure
any longer.
Have the miles
cast shadows so great,
his love
in my veins
no longer
cures the ache?
Have I,
have we,
been chasing rainbows
all along?

Now playing: Jackie and Wilson.

So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes,
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight.
So deep in this swill with the most familiar of swine
For reasons wretched and divine.

She blows outta nowhere, roman candle of the wild
Laughing away through my feeble disguise
No other version of me I would rather be tonight.
And, Lord, she found me just in time

‘Cause with my mid-youth crisis all said and done
I need to be youthfully felt ’cause, God, I never felt young

She’s gonna save me,
Call me “baby”
Run her hands through my hair
She’ll know me crazy,
Soothe me daily
Better yet she wouldn’t care
We’ll steal her Lexus,
Be detectives,
Ride ’round picking up clues
We’ll name our children
Jackie and Wilson,
Raise ’em on rhythm and blues.

Lord, it’d be great to find a place we could escape sometime
Me and my Isis growing black irises in the sunshine
Every version of me dead and buried in the yard outside.
Sit back and watch the world go by.

Happy to lie back watch it burn and rust
We tried the world, good God, it wasn’t for us.

She’s gonna save me,
Call me “baby”
Run her hands through my hair
She’ll know me crazy,
Soothe me daily
Better yet she wouldn’t care
We’ll steal her Lexus,
Be detectives,
Ride ’round picking up clues
We’ll name our children
Jackie and Wilson,
Raise ’em on rhythm and blues.

Cut clean from the dream at night let my mind reset
Looking up from a cigarette, and she’s already left
I start digging up the yard for what’s left of me and our little vignette
For whatever poor soul is coming next

She’s gonna save me,
Call me “baby”
Run her hands through my hair
She’ll know me crazy,
Soothe me daily
Better yet she wouldn’t care
We’ll steal her Lexus,
Be detectives,
Ride ’round picking up clues
We’ll name our children
Jackie and Wilson,
Raise ’em on rhythm and blues.

Now playing: Sure thing.

If you be the cash
I’ll be the rubber band
You be the match
I’ll be your fuse
Boom!
Painter baby you
Could be the muse
I’m the reporter baby
You could be the news
Cause you’re the cigarette
And I’m the smoker
We raise a bet…
Cause you’re the joker
Truth though
You are the chalk
And I could be the blackboard
And you can be the talk
And I could be the walk

Even when the sky comes falling
Even when the sun don’t shine
I got faith in you and I
So put your pretty little hand in mine
Even when we’re down to the wire baby
Even when it’s do or die
We can do it baby simple and plain

Cause this love is a sure thing

You could bet that
Never got to sweat that

You could be the lover
I’ll be the fighter babe
If I’m the blunt
You could be the lighter babe
Fire it up!
Writer baby
You could be the quote
If I’m the lyric baby
You could be the note
Record that!
Saint, I’m a sinner
Prize, I’m a winner
And it’s you
What can I do to deserve that
Paper baby
I’ll be the pen
Say that I’m the one
Cause you are a ten
Real and not pretend!

Even when the sky comes falling
Even when the sun don’t shine
I got faith in you and I
So put your pretty little hand in mine
Even when we’re down to the wire baby
Even when it’s do or die
We can do it babe simple and plain
Cause this love is a sure thing

Rock with me baby
Let me hold you in my arms
Talk with me baby

This love
Between you and I
As simple as pie baby
Such a sure thing
Oh is it a sure thing

Even when the sky comes falling
Even when the sun don’t shine
I got faith in you and I
So put your pretty little hand in mine
Even when we’re down to the wire baby
Even when it’s do or die
We can do it baby simple and plain
This love is a sure thing
Love you like a brother
Treat you like a friend
Respect you like a lover.

Bourbon.

Because your bed is
a confession box and
I haven’t stopped sinning
and you make me forget
what to do with my hands.
Because there are times
we are meant to burn and
now is not one of them.
Because I have loved you
until I have forgotten
what it was like to be whole.
Because this love poem
has turned into an apology.
Because I saw the way
you looked at her.
Because your mouth always
tastes like bourbon and
leaving.

― Lindsey Hobart

Heartbeat.

There comes a time in every life when the world gets quiet and the only thing left is your own heart. So you’d better learn to know the sound of it. Otherwise you’ll never understand what it’s saying.

— Sarah Dessen

Stardust.

In my years of quiet existence,
I have found freedom to grow.
Looking back,
living loudly in such a small town
has been somewhat restraining,
debilitating even.
Such irony.
Too many people think
they know better,
are better
than you.
Judging with quiet eyes,
smiles and sighs.
Saying anything,
agreeing with every lie,
just to take the attention
away from their own indiscretions,
away from their own sorry lives.
To everyone,
every lie tasted better
than the bland truth.
There I was,
young and crying glitter,
wanting to live life
making every mistake,
learning from each one.
But they didn’t condone that.
Always must be proper.
Leave me be.
I know.
I can see
I am so much more
than what I find at the bottom
of every bottle.
Just give me tonight,
just give me every weekend
to get the stardust out of my eyes.
I will learn.
I will grow.
Reality will sink in.
Come due time,
I’ll lead a quiet existence,
one you would approve of.
Be a grown up
with only but specks of starlight
left in her eyes.